I went for another trip to the Ante-natal clinic to see my Foetal consultant, Mr. Shah. I had a sleepless night prior to this appointment. Not because I’m busy at work but because I was worried of the ultrasound outcome. I don’t want another sad news…I have prayed the rosary and asked God to please give me a good news. I felt so uneasy coming to the hospital. I recently got another rosary from good friend Imee and this made me more hopeful in facing this journey of mine.
Scan begins, if I remember right, it took Mr. Shah another half an hour to take a good look at Luke in the monitor. It worries me a lot looking at his unpredictable face. And after half an hour silence, he made his comment saying that “Liver seems coming up to the chest”, not a very good sign I know. If I can choose to be deaf for another hour or so not to hear the next words he has to say, I’d rather be deaf. But of course, I have to listen and absorb every details of all this information. Yet again, this is another day of disappointment for me not expecting things like this. But life must go on, as I always say. I’m not sure whether I am trying to convince myself that this is just usual for life, or maybe, this is my escape to the reality.
I have updated my friends thru text and changed my Facebook status saying, “
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=411707072479&set=a.382840242479.162280.796622479&ref=fbx_album#!/permalink.php?story_fbid=144557592254989&id=796622479
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=411707072479&set=a.382840242479.162280.796622479&ref=fbx_album#!/permalink.php?story_fbid=144557592254989&id=796622479
Thanks for the thoughts.
I had my 25th week scan last monday and I am so sad to hear that the doctor is now suspecting the liver coming up to the chest at this stage. I understand from different researches that once liver is involved, it is a POORER prognosis. They have told me about a Feto procedure (Foetal surgery) but I don’t know if I will consider it for now. There’s only one hospital in London who performs the procedure and I think there is a greater risk to undertake if I’m going all through that.
My heart is broken into pieces…if I can only do something to push all this organs down. But nothing I can do and I feel so helpless. I thought I am alright for now coz I have lots of support from family and friends. But it looks like I’ve started from scratch again.
I wish I will be tougher in my next few weeks of battle. Another scan again in two weeks time and I’ll patiently wait for a hopeful positive development. Please include me and baby Luke in your prayers.
I am just about to start my roller coaster ride…and I hope that I’ll be able to make it until the end. It’s hypocrisy to say that I am strong enough to face this trial, in fact, tears are still pouring down and I felt so weak…very weak.
But the Bible says, “God keeps His promise, and He will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out”.
For now, nothing I can do but to hold on to HIM, so tight that I will not loose HIS hands. I will let HIM share this burden with me. I am sure, the Lord will keep me going.
In God's grace,
I had my 25th week scan last monday and I am so sad to hear that the doctor is now suspecting the liver coming up to the chest at this stage. I understand from different researches that once liver is involved, it is a POORER prognosis. They have told me about a Feto procedure (Foetal surgery) but I don’t know if I will consider it for now. There’s only one hospital in London who performs the procedure and I think there is a greater risk to undertake if I’m going all through that.
My heart is broken into pieces…if I can only do something to push all this organs down. But nothing I can do and I feel so helpless. I thought I am alright for now coz I have lots of support from family and friends. But it looks like I’ve started from scratch again.
I wish I will be tougher in my next few weeks of battle. Another scan again in two weeks time and I’ll patiently wait for a hopeful positive development. Please include me and baby Luke in your prayers.
I am just about to start my roller coaster ride…and I hope that I’ll be able to make it until the end. It’s hypocrisy to say that I am strong enough to face this trial, in fact, tears are still pouring down and I felt so weak…very weak.
But the Bible says, “God keeps His promise, and He will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out”.
For now, nothing I can do but to hold on to HIM, so tight that I will not loose HIS hands. I will let HIM share this burden with me. I am sure, the Lord will keep me going.
In God's grace,
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